Disappointment

Hello there, dear friend. I thought you had left for a while. I realized you were gone after I started to feel confident in those around me. When I found myself able to trust again. But no, you came back. You came back after all of this time. One word can set you back, that one word is disappointment.

Whether the word or action causes you to fall, you still fall, and it still hurts. And it is a pain you cannot explain… no matter how hard you try. It feels like the moment you drop and break your favorite plate. When the person who used to love you no longer does. When you plan out how a date will go in your head, for them to never show up and cancel. When you finally tell them how you feel… just to be told that they never saw you “like that”.

After that word, that action, keeps throwing you down and down and down, you start to prepair yourself. You no longer tell people how you truely feel out of fear of that word. You stop making plans because of that word. You start walking on eggshells and eventually stop walking all together,

Oh what a vicious cycle.

But this time, I am glad you are here disappointment. I am glad you are in my life. Because for every “no” I recieve, five more opportunities turn into “yes”. You can close all the doors you want, but I can bust down walls and make my own door.

 

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Wait… We Don’t Have A Minority Scholarship?

That moment when you are filling out numerous amounts of scholarship applications for college when it hits you. If I represent such a small portion of the population, is there a minority scholarship? Quickly I raced to my laptop and googled Idaho minority scholarships.

But my hope was short lived.

Idaho DOES NOT have a minority scholarship. Why???
And this is the moment when someone says that it is not fair for a person to get a scholarship for being a minority. But the fact is it is fair.

I have learned that due to the color of my skin, I was born with a disadvantage. I had teachers that refused to help me learn not matter how hard I would try and try to receive help to understand concepts. I had teachers that called me lower class because I am black. And years of my family being considered lower class has made financial struggles for me and other minorities.

These scholarships send first family graduates to college. These scholarships give us the opportunity to leave our harsh environments, give us the chance to pursue a dream of being equal and have equal opportunities.

There are scholarships for everyone, every religion, state, hobby, interest, personality, career field. Everyone can find a scholarship and there are so many different types… but why are there not more minority scholarships?

Keep in mind minority is not just a skin color, or nationality. Minority is defined as, the smaller number or part, especially a number that is less than half the whole number.